Archive for July, 2010

Choosing.

Thursday, July 29th, 2010

I confess that I like to read about and watch TV shows that talk about stupid criminals.  There is the guy that tried to break into a home near Christmas by attempting to slide down an old chimney, only to get stuck halfway down.  Another guy tried to rob a convenience store with a squirt gun, the owner had a real gun.  And it’s always fun to watch what happens to people who try to steal an ATM machine (usually the attempt to remove it from its concrete base results in the “pulling” vehicle losing its rear bumper or even back axle).  There are books out about how stupid people can be.  The Darwin Awards has the stories of people who do the most foolish things and frequently end up paying for it with their lives.  For me the most memorable story from the books is about the man that “super-glued” his hands to the back end of a rhinoceros at the zoo.  You have to ask…What was he thinking?!  I’m reminded of the joke “What was the redneck’s last words?”  “Hey, ya’ll watch this.”  We laugh, but are we really that far behind these folks?  There’s a reason why the warning says to never lick a moving blender.  Nearly every day we pilot 1,500 pounds of steel at breakneck speeds, often going within a few feet of others doing the same thing.  That’s right, we drive cars… and in the midst of our piloting these vehicles at 102 ft per second (70 mph), we also look down to change the radio station, to read a newspaper, unwrap our sausage biscuit,  send a text, and clean up the coffee we spilled.  If it takes you 3 seconds to grab that hash brown from the bag…you’ve traveled over a football field without looking at the road.  Eating your Chinese carry-out with chopsticks….probably not the best choice (ahem!),

We are a busy people, and we like to multi-task.  We talk on the phone and try to read our email at the same time.  We try to cook, and watch the news, and ask our kids how the day was.  We are a busy people and it causes us to make bad choices, or make compromises.  We know what fried food will do to us…but it is still American’s favorite meal.  Hamburgers, fries, fried chicken, fried fish, fried Oreos, funnel cake, fried candy bars (can you tell the State Fair is coming?).   We know we need balance in our lives – work, play, worship, family, friends – they all need a place in our lives.  We know what is good, but we are easily distracted.  We chase after the wrong things.  Micah 6:8 helps put things in perspective: He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.  So maybe we should take a lesson from the folks who get trapped in chimneys and glue themselves to rhinoceroses, let’s choose to do what is right.

Chad

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The Power of the Blog

Thursday, July 22nd, 2010

I’m ruined.  I’ve always believed that only 6 or 7 people read this blog, all of them members of the church.  This bit of information was very comforting.  After all, I know they are already Christians, that they already attend FV Presbyterian, and that any heresy I might actually say here can be quickly dealt with by Cindy.  Blogging was fun, carefree, mindless drivel…..but then it happened.  We had a couple visit the church, and they said the blog is the reason they came. (Insert blood curdling scream here).  Ollie and Wanda (not their real names) said that they were trying to decide on where to go to church when he came upon my blog.  Ollie (still not his real name) said after reading a few posts he decided to come visit our church.  OK….this is very unsettling.  I have come to the frightening realization that there may be strangers reading these demented ravings.  This has placed an unbearable weight upon me.  Does this mean I have to be pastoral, caring, relevant, and theologically orthodox?  Should I be checking my spelling and punctuation?  Ahhh, the pressure!  The simple carefree decision by Ollie and Wanda to visit FV Presbyterian Church has placed an Atlas sized burden upon me.  What I write here matters.  Who knows….my words could affect the eternal destination of millions.  World peace could hang in the balance as to whether the dictator of a certain Asian country likes my posting.  My deeply insightful writings may be holding off an alien attack!  Alas, with great power, comes great responsibility.  It occurred to me that the economic crisis our world is facing could be my fault!  But then I remembered I started this blog after the economy collapsed. Whew…dodged that bullet.  I’d prefer not to talk about my writings affect on the recovery or a certain oil spill – thank you very much!
Over the past several months there have been a surprising number of “hits” to the blog.  To me, they obviously were bots and spammers.  Responses to the blog have overwhelmingly been spam.  Thank you, I don’t need to buy any more whale blubber.  While deleting most, I posted a couple in the comment section so I could pretend someone was reading and responding to my answer to the reader’s insomnia.  But deep inside I knew that “buypocketprotectors.com” was not a real person.  Well, folks, I can pretend no more.  Real people read this blog….real people with real thoughts…and well, ummm, real people.  I’ve got to take this blogging much more seriously.  I can’t take for granted the impact I am making on the world.  Ollie and Wanda, thank you for helping me see the light!  I will take my efforts much more seriously.  OK, I lied.  I can’t take it more seriously.  I have no deep thoughts to share.  I have no great insights.  We are in serious trouble if anyone is counting on me to help with world peace or alien attacks.  No, I’m still struggling to figure out which sock goes on my right foot and which one goes on my left, how to play a kazoo, and how to “tie” my Velcro laced shoes.  I am delighted that Ollie and Wanda came to church and I pray it was a blessing to them, but if it was the blog that motivated them, it could be argued they are in serious need of prayer.
The Apostle Paul was encouraging the Colossian Church to faithful living when he wrote, “And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” (3:17)  We are called to give our very best in everything we do.  Whether it is at work, or home, or church, we should be doing it as if we were doing it for Jesus.  When we blog, we should blog for Jesus.  When we sing, we should sing for Jesus.  When we mow our lawns, we should mow for Jesus.  When we talk to our friends, we should talk with the heart of Jesus.  I am thankful that in the midst of it all, God doesn’t ask about our ability, only our willingness to do it for Him.  I’ve decided that whether it’s  6 or 7 who read this blog, or even 10 or 12….I’ll write my blog in the name of Jesus, giving thanks.
Chad

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Road Construction

Tuesday, July 20th, 2010

My house is shaking. The glasses in the cabinet are clinking together. The windows are rattling. My internal organs are vibrating. The tremors last from 7 a.m. until 6 p.m. It’s not an earthquake, it’s road construction. For the last several months they have been putting in an extension to Judd Parkway. Construction vehicles large enough to move the entire island of Manhattan have been rumbling along my property line. Today the steam roller (I’m sure there’s a newer name for it since it hasn’t used steam since Abe Lincoln was president – wikipedia refers to them as “road rollers” – pfft, yeah right) was going back and forth making sure the road base was significantly compacted all the way to the earth’s core. The planned date for opening the road will be Christmas, at least that was the original date set. This road will be great help to everyone who wants to bypass the bottleneck in “downtown Varina”, but I guess I’m selfish in wishing I had the pine forest back. All I know is eleven hours a day, if I’m home, I get to watch things fall off shelves, pictures swing on their hooks, and cracks in the wall reenacting the seismic activity of the great San Francisco earthquake of 1906.
It’s only a few months until the construction ends, and the road becomes open to traffic. At least the dust will finally settle down. It’s hard to make supper on the grill when a half inch of dirt collects on it by the time it’s cooked. Soon we will trade in the low resonant shaking from giant construction equipment for the thrum, thrum, thrum of cars with their stereos cranked up; the whine of Japanese motorcycles accompanied by the brop, brop, brop of Harleys; and the shrill sound of over-revved engines driven by guys who think their ‘94 Pinto is a “tuner car”. Such is the price of progress. Everyone wants something good and convenient, as long as it’s not built in their back yard. This time it’s my backyard! I’m trying to think of someway to take advantage of this road….to turn a bad into a good. I’ve considered adding two more stories to my home, just so I can paint a billboard-like advertisement for the church on the house. So far that hasn’t been enthusiastically embraced by Cindy. I gave up on the idea of trying to set up a toll booth to make a little money out of this mess; the construction workers have ignored my cardboard signs that say “Stop Pay $2 Toll Ahead”. I considered paintball “target practice” once the road opens up, but only the local preteen boys are supportive of that idea. So I guess Judd Parkway is just something I’m going to have to live with.
Psalm 1 begins, “Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. 2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. 3 He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers.” My desire is to be a man who meditates on God’s Word. But I am easily distracted. Rattling windows, phones ringing, my stomach growling, a fly buzzing, the dog snoring…..they all pull me away from what is important. God’s Word offers strength and peace, counsel and wisdom, hope and blessing. So I seek guidance from the scriptures, and God helps me to find blessings and joy. I have noticed something good about all this construction; the shaking of the house makes my recliner feel like those old vibrating beds from the 60s. I get a blast from the past and it doesn’t even cost a quarter.
Chad

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The Metal Monster in the Corner wants to change me.

Wednesday, July 7th, 2010

I have a rather large piece of exercise equipment here in our family/bonus room.  It offers the ability to do about 7,000 different exercises.  Regular use of this monster and a proper diet should put me in the physical shape of a Greek god.  There’s only one problem…..OK… two problems.   I need to eat a proper diet, and I actually have to use the machine.  We’ve had the machine for several years.  For a while, its lack of use was causing it to collect not just dust bunnies, but dust mammoths.  Now, it gets cleaned off more often, but it still doesn’t get used.  Cindy suggests we give it away to some other deserving person who can put it in their corner and ignore it.  But I won’t let her do it.  Having it there makes me think that my getting healthy is just around the corner.  I’ve convinced myself that all I need is one small nudge and I’ll be pumping iron.  That’s right… just a baby step away is the body of Conan the Barbarian.  Why just even thinking about it, makes my biceps swell.  Please ladies, get control of yourselves.  Alas, I haven’t found the required nudge to get me off my couch, and on the workout bench.  I’ve convinced myself that I’m too busy exercising my mouse-clicking finger to do a little bend and stretch.  It’s too easy for me to put off ‘til tomorrow what should have been done last decade.  Besides, I have to climb the steps to the second floor just to get here….isn’t that enough punishment for one day???

The metal behemoth in the corner reminds me of other good intentions I have.  If I did half of what I intended to do, I’d be an impressive person.  Why, I’d probably get nominated for a Nobel prize.  Imagine it….I’d brush and floss! My grass would be green and my flowers would grow!  I’d be able to complete a sudoku puzzle!  I’d would write sermons that would keep people awake!  I’d learn how to fold a fitted sheet so it comes out looking square!  My prayer life would be legendary!  I’d actually make it all the way through a book longer than Green Eggs and Ham!  And my “to do list” would actually get thinner than the “yellow pages”!

For some folks there is a rather large book that is collecting dust somewhere in their house.  Just like my exercise machine, it sits there calling to be used, to change your life.  But it gets ignored.  Maybe tomorrow, I’m too busy watching reruns of Mork and Mindy.  II Timothy 3 says, “16All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, 17so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”  The Bible is a life changing book.  It offers us a greater understanding of who we are as God’s people, and who God is.  It’s time to dig it out from the bottom shelf of the night stand and put it to use.  It’s time to discover what God’s Word has to say to you.

Chad

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